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Welcome to my documented journey through weight loss and rediscovery.
I reached my goal weight on April 25th 2007!
I can't take much more!! I was just checking in on you. I saw your photos, you can really tell you've lost weight in your face! Keep up the good work!! 
I did not do well with staying on track yesterday (Monday) 
Boy was that an UNDERSTATEMENT!! Within 10 mins of taking the pill I had that nasty taste in my mouth. I had it all night and all the next day. So the second night I thought I would put the little pill in a little bit of cheese and then swallow the cheese... thinking that the coating on the pill made it worse. WRONG!! 
And drinking water, just made it worse.
Although it's kind of bitter sweet. I was so happy to see her and have her home, but so sad and heart broken that they are so far apart from each other. They are so much in love 
But on the other hand I want to feel good. Before this new medicine my anxiety was through the roof. Oh yeah, the medicine I was put on that I gained weight with was Remeron.
I have entered my pets in a contest on youtube. (debcoart's pet video contest #7)
To see the videos I have entered into the contest click here.
http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=6A232D30091C3C8F
If you have a youtube account and would like to vote for one of my videos. Please go to this link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V15BiTdvgxY
Then click where it says "Post a text comment" In the comments box, on debcoart's site type in your vote, include the name of the video and the youtube user name of the video your voting for. Hurry cause the contest deadline is Saturday Nov. 3rd, 2007 @ midnight EST
All details for entering and or voting are explained in debcoart's video labeled (pet video contest #7)
Thanks!!
The doctor came in to talk to Kelsey earlier today. He said he looked at the x-rays and said he didn't see stones in her bladder but there were defiantly stones in both kidneys. Her blood work actually was pretty good. Her urine had 12 + of blood in it.
So for right now they are treating her as if she has a kidney infection, even though her blood work looked good. They are sending off her urine for a culture, which will be back in 2-3 days. He also said something about sending her home with a medication that will help desolve the stones. Has anyone heard of this before?
Her pain is pretty much under control. And is not running a fever anymore.... so far. Generally fevers spike at night, so we shall see.
She is to have scans again in a month to see if there is any improvement in the stones.
Yesterday I talked to my daughter online, she told me she was having pains on her right side above the hip. She thought it was probably gas and shrugged it off. Then I talked to her online this afternoon and the pain was a little worse, so she took pain reliever and told me if it didn't get any better she would go to the doctor the next day. She didn't feel like she running a temperature at that time, but she didn't have a thermometer.
Then I got a call from her about an hour ago (12:46 am est), she is on her way to the emergency room. She was chilling and shaking really bad and the pain was sever. Said she couldn't take anymore. Again she they don't have a thermometer so she had no idea what her temperature was.
At 1:45 am about 10 mins ago, she calls, they are at the hospital. Her temp is 38.5 C = 101.5 F. She couldn't talk long cause it is very expensive to call the USA from Jordan. I will be calling her in a bit to see what else she has found out. Though they think she has a kidney infection. OMG if that is true, that is very bad. Very bad for anyone, but for her it is VERY VERY bad, due to the fact that her bladder is made up mostly from bowel (her bladder is full of e-coli). So if any urine is back flowing into the kidneys she will be very sick.
I will update more later.
We got most of her stuff moved into storage yesterday. A few things came over to our house and what we couldn’t fit into storage, or have room for at our house we just had to leave. Which makes me sad because that stuff is a part of Kelsey. But I can only do so much. Seeing her empty apartment, leaves me even more sad and empty because it’s really becoming a reality that, she isn’t coming home, at least for a very long time.
I weigh in at Jenny Craig today. I have a feeling I have gained. I only got one walk in this week, TOM is here, and I have had a few days of straying off my menu. But next week is a fresh start, I will do better.
I spent most of the day over to Kelsey’s apartment, packing, sorting, and throwing away stuff. Moving day is this Friday. We are moving most of her stuff into storage. We won’t have room for all of it. I have a friend coming to take her sofa. The other stuff that we don’t have room for or we can’t find anyone to take, will be put in the garbage. I have been trying to find a good home for her 4 hermit crabs. 
I just wish the pet store would take them back. She had 5 crabs; one was in a smaller cage, while the other 4 were in a bigger cage. The one that was separated, had been trying to switch shells, and the others were ganging up on him so she put him in the smaller cage. Well then she went on her trip. I was going over ever day making sure they had food and water. Well I noticed one day that the one in the single cage hadn’t touched his food for 3 days. I didn’t think much about it, because hermit crabs molt, and when they do that, they bury themselves and can stay buried for 6-8 weeks. And normally I would have left him alone, but inside the crab cages were tons and tons of gnats. They had to go!!! So bought new substrate, took the both cages out on the balcony, found the 4 in the bigger cage. I then moved to the smaller cage. I sifted and sifted and sifted and there was no crab!! There was no shell and no body of a crab! O_O 
I was totally baffled! I sifted and looked again… nothing was found. So I finished up the larger cage with the new clean (gnat free) substrate, put the remaining 4 crabs back. The next time I talked to Kelsey on the phone, she said, “the crab must have gotten out” I said “there was no way, he could have climbed a slick wall and gotten out” I mean there were no vines or anything to climb onto to get out. Anyway a few weeks pass, and I was sorting and packing up the kitchen, and I looked down and just happen to look between the stove and the counter, and I saw this small ice cream cone shaped shell sticking out. I said to myself, “NO WAY!!!!” I got down there, wanted to pull the shell out but was leery; because I was afraid I would see a dead stinky hermit crab inside his shell. But there was nothing. So I took the bottom drawer out of the stove to get a better look under the stove to see if I could find him, again I found nothing. A few days later I was in the bathroom packing and cleaning, I opened up the closet door in the bathroom and on the floor way in the corner I saw something… I got a little closer; sure enough it was the missing naked hermit crab without his shell! I felt so bad that he had to die that way. 
My daughter was born with some birth defects involving her bladder and kidney’s. After countless surgeries from birth to age seven, the problems she was born with are some what fixed.
I got a letter from my daughter’s urologist Sept 3rd. It was sent out to all patients who are on intermittent catheterization or who have had a procedure to enlarge their bladder using bowel segments. Well my daughter has both. The letter goes on to say, “we have begun seeing a few cases of cancer developing in patients with bladders like yours, as have doctors at other institutions. It is important to understand, how ever that not all patients will develop cancer. At this time we do not know what caused these cancers to develop, or why they developed in some patients and not others. We understand that this new information about the possibility of cancer might make our patients uncomfortable. We want to reassure you again that we have only seen a few cases of cancer so far, but feel that it is important to watch all of our patients closely.” WHAT? What do you mean CANCER? WHAT else can go wrong? My daughter’s medical condition is very complex; I worry about her being in another country. What if she gets sick? Will the doctors there know what to do? I don’t even know if her medical condition is covered under his medical insurance. I am so worried about her.
I don’t know how much more stress I can take.
As far as my weight, I am pretty much maintaining. But here in the last few days, I just want to eat eat eat. I am so afraid of sliding back into my old habits.
Well the month of August has been one heck of an emotional rollercoaster ride! I am still on it, but it has slowed down a bit (for now). Let me explain. On Aug 13th my daughter told me she has decided to stay in
My daughter and I are very close, every thing I do, and every where I go, reminds me of her. We had so much fun together.
I have been very depressed since she left, even more so now since she told me her plans to stay there. This all has hit me like a ton of bricks. I am not sleeping, which makes me even more emotional.
I know, every parent goes through this when their children leave the nest. She has been living out on her own for a little over 2 years now, but now that she is living in another country, it is so much harder.
She has an apartment full of stuff that her dad and I have to pack up and put into storage. That’s real fun. I have to find a home for her hermit crabs. Her 2 birds are here at our house. Her dad said we can’t keep the birds, because they drive him nuts, they drive me nuts too but I don’t think I can just get rid of them, they are her birds. I guess I feel that, that is all I have to hold on too that is tied to her.
That is all for now…
Sorry about the lack of posting lately.
Per my last post my daughter, K had arrived at her destination safely. K and M was married Aug 6th. They took professional pictures but they are not back yet, but she did send me some that were taken with the digital camera. I hardly recognized her! She looked so grown up and beautiful! I absolutely loved her dress! I can’t wait to see the rest of the pictures. She is having a lot of fun, but I sense she is home sick and she misses her birds terribly! I can’t wait for her to come back, I miss her so much! M (her husband) will be joining her here sometime later. I know that sounds and seems odd, but it’s a long and complicated story, so I won’t get into it.
I will be super glad to have her back so the birds can go back to her house! They have been screaming A LOT during the day. I know they miss her but geesh, do they have to have their air raid sirens going off 24/7!!!!!
I also have been going over to her apartment to water and feed her 5 hermit crabs. I told her they were not coming over here!! LOL
I had my weigh in at Jenny Craig this last Saturday. I knew I was going to have huge weight gain, and I did… I gained 6.7 pounds in one week!!!!!!!!! OMG! No no no it's not what you think!
It’s because I ran out of my water pills (Triamt/hctz 50/25 mg) about a week and a half ago. My legs hurt so badly from the excess fluid! I went to see my cardiologist yesterday, and got that all taken care of, so I have been running, running, running and RUNNING to the restroom today, which is ok by me!
OMG this heat we have been having is unbearable! Today it was in 95° F with a heat index of 105° F 
our state fair is currently going right now. I would love to go but not when it’s this hot!
Speaking of the state fair, the Jenny Craig center I go to have these flyers telling how many calories are in some of the more popular items at the fair. Here goes!
Bloomin’ Onion – 2882 calories
Cheesecake on a stick – 655 calories
Deep fried twinkie – 420 calories
Funnel cake – 800 calories
Jumbo corn dog – 700 calories
Deep fried kind size snickers on a stick – 800 calories
Dippin’ dots candy bar crunch (1/2 cup) – 208 calories
1 Deep fried oreo – 98 calories
Nachos and cheese – 900 calories
MY GOODNESS!!! What’s with the deep fried twinkies, oreos and snicker bars! I can’t even imagine how fatty and rich they would be. YUCK!
The only thing that sounds good and that I would want out of any of that is the funnel cake and the corn dog. But that isn’t going to happen, it just isn’t worth it.
My daughter arrived to her destination at
I talk to her briefly when she got to the airport; she was very tired as she didn’t sleep much since she left Wednesday. And I spoke with her today; they had a very busy day, with all the last minute planning for the wedding coming up this Sunday.
As for my weight and exercise for this week. Staying pretty much on track, except for 2 days . My daughter and I went to a great greek restaurant the day before she left, (that was yummy) and hubby and I went out to eat right after we took her to the airport (yummy also)!!
Have only gotten 4 of my 5 walks in this week. I weigh in tomorrow afternoon, so I will probably get the last one in before I go weigh in.
Have a great weekend!!!
My daughter left on her trip today. We had so many things to do before going to the airport, it was just crazy! About half way to the airport the flood gates opened up. Of course I am a worrier and all the worst possible case scenarios were running through my head. Of course she was scared and so nervous, but she kept asking me if I was ok and telling me everything will be fine.
We got her all checked in; we went as far with her as the airport would allow us, hugged and said our goodbyes, I just wanted to run after her and tell her “SHE CAN’T GO!!!” I know she is a grown woman and I have to let go and let her fly. But it is just so hard!
She will be landing in
I so wanted to be at my baby girls wedding. It hurts, it hurts a lot. But what can you do?
With all these stresses I have been fighting the urge not to eat eat eat! I haven’t done much walking or exercising in this week.
I will be bird sitting for my daughters 2 cockatiels (Junie and Ipyana) while she is gone for the month. They are missing her already!!!
I am not good at blogging… I am not good with words… So when I am feeling overwhelmed, worried, stressed and anxious my thougths and feelings run wildly through my head and I can't seem to organize them enough to get them out on paper or on this blog. It becomes one big jumbled and scattered mess. I then get overwhelmed and I tell myself "oh just forget it" and sweep it under the run. But right now I am about to bust, so I am going to do my best. Here goes...
I had mentioned in a previous post that my daughter is getting married in Aug. I am happy for them, but also concerned. I'm not going to get into a lot of details, but let me explain a little bit. She... They... He...
I got to go… I can’t do this right now. Maybe later.
I weighed in last Saturday and lost 4.3 lbs! 
I was so happy! Since reaching my goal in April I haven't been exercising all that much, so last week I stepped it up, (it sure paid off). Yesterday it was so hot out, but I went on my walk anyway.
Yesterday my daughter and I went to Glazed Expressions. It's where you pick out your pottery and your paints & then once it is done they fire it for you. I thought to myself ok that sounds easy enough!!! So after looking through all their pottery I picked out a tall coffee mug, got my paints and brushes, sat down and just looked at it. I had no idea of what I wanted on it; I went through several books for any kind of ideas. I came across these really cute lady bugs. They had adorable little shoes on and some were holding flowers and some had purses, (so cute). You would think I could sketch those little buggers onto my mug. 
You wouldn't believe how many times I sketched them out. I had pencil marks and smudges all over my mug. LOL I was so nervous, and I was so afraid I would mess up. The lady at Glazed Expressions told me I was thinking too much, to let go and just paint. so I did.
I finally managed to get them on there and painted, but to me it looks awful. We didn't get done, so tonight we are going back to finish up. My daughter picked out a heart shaped box. Hers looks fabulous! I think next time I will be more comfortable with it.
We live on the third floor of our appartment and for the second time in we had a raccoon on our balcony. I thought that to be very strange! Has anyone else experienced the same?
Oh boy, it’s been so long I don’t even know where to begin.
Well… we went on our trip. We had a fantastic time! The scenery was absolutely breath taking. We got a lot of pictures, but pictures can’t do god’s beauty justice!
I mentioned in my last entry that I had another challenge and I never said what it was!!
Well of course it has all to do with FOOD! I was worried I would over eat and or all the wrong stuff and then I would come back to find out I had gained a huge amount of weight! Well, I gained 3 pounds, not as much as I had thought I had. Every since our trip I have been struggling to stay on track!! The last few weeks have been a big challenge; I seem to be very focused on any and all food. It’s slowly getting better. I have been slacking on my exercise as well, so I have been trying to get motivated for that as well. *sigh*. For this week I did get six 30 min walks done! Yayyyyy My daughter has been a big help in getting me out and walking.
She is also trying to slim down and get in shape, as she is getting married in Aug!! WOW, my baby girl is getting married in less than a month!! I am so very happy for them, but sad, because my baby girl is all grown up!
As I stated in previous post, I was very unhappy at the job I was at. I didn’t think the job was for me. So I let go of it and am currently looking for a new job. Haven’t had much luck yet, but I am still looking. I am sure when I start working; my mind will not be on food 24/7!
Sorry it has taken me so long to post any updates, I just have had a lot going on lately.
Leave me a comment sometime, let me know you’re here and how you’re doing!
Got to get to bed its
I have been trying to find a balance in calories since I reached my goal. The first 2 weigh-ins after I reached my goal, I gained just a little bit. This week I stayed the same. Which made me happy, but I have another challenge coming up starting tomorrow. My husband and I are going on vacation for the first time in our 24 years of marriage!!! It’s off to
Gotta get to bed it is
Oh yeah I forgot to mention while I was drowning in my pitty party, that my husband and I went shopping for clothes, cause the shorts and capri's I have are from last year and they are a size 18!!! I am now in a size 10. That makes me happy!
I have a question for everyone out there. When you got to your goal or was close to it, did you suddenly just feel like you had lost yourself, like you didn't know who you were mentally anymore? I have been experiencing that alot lately. I should be happy that I am down over a 100 pounds, but something, I am not sure what, is making me uncomfortable. Maybe it just have to do with the depression I am going through right now, or maybe it brought out more of my depression.
I made cookies for the family but didn't eat any! 
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